I don’t know what I did, I don’t know how I hurt you or even if I hurt you, and I don’t know why you’re acting like this. I know you don’t want to talk, I understand that maybe it’s too soon. When I sent you that Facebook message, that was me trying to extend the olive branch so that we could at least be civil to each other. But this, this isn’t civility.
You can’t even look at me. You won’t look at me even when I stand right next to you, or in front of you. I wasn’t trying to address you, but the least you could do is look at me. But instead you just silently walked straight away. Is it too much for me to stand within a 5-foot radius of you? Can you even stand being in the same room with me for more then a minute or two? Can you not talk to our mutual friends just because I’m having a conversation with them?
That isn’t even what hurts. What hurts is that now, to you I’m non-existent. What hurts is that too you, I’m not a human being, I don’t have feelings, I don’t care. What hurts is that you can’t even look at me and you make me feel like I’m part of the wall behind me. You make me want to disappear.
No, we probably won’t date again. I don’t want to date again. But can’t we at least be buds? At the bare minimum civil? This isn’t civil. I’d almost prefer for you to go out of your way to try to hurt me or get back at me, or something because then I’d know at least you care. But this? Ignoring me to the point where I feel so invisible that it hurts? And believe me, it hurts. This isn’t what I wanted for us.
Talk to me, I don’t care what you say. Tell me you hate me and never want to see me again, at least that way I’ll know. Maybe you don’t even have to say a word. Look at me. Look me straight in the eyes, even just for a second, and I’ll know how you feel. But please, please stop treating me like air you don’t want to breathe.
Just look at me.
-Jules
Sadly this is normally the way things go over a break up. Although you should know that it doesn't necessarily mean you've done something if he won't be civil. Most guys have problems coming to terms with a break up and act coldly to give themselves time.
ReplyDeleteIt'll all come around :)
By the way I love the blog title and description, but being British just seems pretty normal to me :P But then, I don't know any better. Haha. x
Thanks, I never really understand the way that guys' heads work :P
ReplyDeleteOhh I like that simile.
ReplyDelete"Air you don't want to breathe." Very poetic. =P
Is this the guy you like just dated? Or is a while back?
Text me, cos I am a bit lost.
Most guys heads don't work, that's where the problem comes in :P
ReplyDelete