Thinner And Prettier

If there's one thing I know how to do with absolute confidence that I will do it correctly, it's to ruin a good thing. Can't keep a good thing going for too long, because good gets boring, and we can't have that now can we? I am a pro at pushing people away and getting close to people I shouldn't just to keep things interesting. I'm a school counsellor's nightmare.

I've never been too good at the whole morally-based self discipline thing either. Maybe that's why I popped pills at 7 amand wore stilettos to school today. Maybe it's the fact that I can think of nothing but screwing boys who aren't my boyfriend.

But he makes me happy. I keep forgetting that he makes me happy.

It's a very bad thing when I get bored, and bored I am beginning to become. I tend to do stupid albeit exciting shit when I'm bored and who knows what ridiculous thing I'll do to screw this one up, because let's face it, I'm bound to do something. Maybe not. Everything is so flux-y right now.

You know, mono makes you lose weight, and according to the scale in the bathroom I weigh a grand 85 lbs right now. You'd think it'd be a confidence booster to be the skinniest sophomore on the face of the planet, but I just feel like an empty vase. Like someone stole my flowers and poured a bunch of perfume in me to try and compensate for the loss.
Here I am, thinner and prettier.

I think I might dye my hair again, perhaps red this time. Not subtle red, like fire engine squashing cherries red.
Yeah, I think I'd like that.


...... (the sound silence makes)
Julia