And I mean that in the dirtiest way possible, I sincerely do.
Kidding!
Not that I'm one to subscribe to society's predisposed views of women and how we're supposed to be codependent and need men in our lives (just think Bella Swan...) and want to get married and have 6 children and cook dinner every night, but I kind of need a boyfriend. Dear God that sounds desperate. Ok, I don't need one. In fact, a boyfriend is probably the last I need. Honestly, after my recent shenanigans involving boys whom I'm not dating, I should probably just abstain from that entire half of the world's population for a while. *coughMwbcough*
I mean, obviously I don't need a dude to 'complete me' cuz that's bullshit and people like that have no spines. Proven scientific fact. They just sort of flop around on the ground because they have no vertebrae...
Hah. Weird image.
Anyway, I don't need a guy to call my own, I just want one is all. I've been single for a good eight months (not including silly 1-week losses of judgement) and I think I'm ready to try again. Here's my dilemma: There are no cute, interesting boys in Hicktown. There are cute boys. There are interesting boys. but there are no cute and interesting boys.
It's rather tragic. I need a new boy to waste time on!!
Boop beep boop (the sound a robot makes)
Julia
You know what the spineless part gives me an image of? God this is going to sound nerdy...You know in the second Harry Potter movie where Lockhart attempts to fix Harry's broken arm after breaking while playing quidic, and actually just removes the bone so his arm just flops around...Imagine having a spine like that. I'm sure that image is just as painful as the spineless people we have to put up with. Ha. Great image.
ReplyDeleteBy the way, I don't actually like Harry Potter that much, but we should still go and see the new film. =)
Hey. :) great post - I know how you feel! It's not a case of need (you're right about girls like that being spineless), it's a case of want. But where are all the cute and interesting boys! They're certainly not here either. lots of love. :) xx
ReplyDeletei have the same problem but with females in England :/
ReplyDeletei feel your pain :P
and yes i have no spine!
xxx
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!
ReplyDeleteThat wasn't sarcastic all-capital-letter laughter. This post was really hilarious. For real beans. I would proceed in this comment by making a sexist comment about how it's so rare that women are funny, but I know everyone hates me for that.
The last eight words were totally genius.
I have sort of the opposite problem, but it is a problem. There are so many girls that I know that I'm totally obsessed with, and when it comes down to it--I'm never going to be able to pick just one.
Yep, that's the appeal of the Mormon Church to me. All hail Glenn Beck.