Gay Camping

I went on an impromptu camp adventure yesterday with a few friends. We had two handles of vodka and a 30-rack, so you know shit went down.

I mean, how could it not have? Hello, drunk teenagers in the woods! That is like a plea for shenanigans and then some.

So here's what happened:
We all got together and drove down to the site, which was fucking far away but in a gorgeous bit of country way south of Denver. Like, if we had continued driving for another 30 miles, we would've been in New Mexico.

Anyway, we get to this amazing site and set up the largest, most obnoxious tent I've ever seen. There were wildflowers everywhere.

Time passes, drinking ensues, the shenanigans begin. Speaking personally, I got absolutely hammered. I mean, what else does one do while camping? Eat them self into a hotdog coma?

Anyway, the night continues and the two gay guys on the trip, who only met that day, begin to get cozier and cozier with each other. This prompts all of the straight girls to push them together in any way possible. It was good fun.

And then a cop rolls up.

Now, by this point, I am drunk to the point of not being able to pass myself off as sober. As soon as the cop turned on his flashlight, I was like "nope, that's it, I'm going to jail tonight, sorry ma" He had stopped at our site because we had a fire going. Apparently, despite the site not having a fire ban, the entire county was under one, but it had started after we had gotten to the site.

The cop was basically the world's largest bro. He doused our fire and drove away without asking too many questions. I'm pretty sure he knew what we were up to (I mean, come on, what else would a large group of underage kiddos be doing while camping at 2 am? Knitting?) but he didn't look into it. We didn't have any blatant signs of drinking, and the cop seemed pretty tired, so I think he just said an internal 'fuck it' and continued on his merry way.

Best part: I was so gone that I didn't remember that there had even been a cop until one of my friends reminded me this morning. Aw yeah.

Anyway, after the cop rolled out, we were all ready to hit the sack. All the girls ended up in the big tent and our two gays ended up in the tiny tent. I think you can draw the conclusion that we all came to as soon as this happened.  Actually, we didn't need to draw any conclusions, because for the next few hours, that tent was emitting some really, really raunchy sounds.

Cough, go get em', boys!

We woke up, hiked off our hangovers, and came home. I still smell like a campfire.

Now, being in the middle of Big Fucking Nowhere, I obviously had no cell service and was unable to text.  For once in my life, I was glad of this.

It wasn't because I needed to get away from my demanding life or shit like that, it was because Technicolor Boy and I were having a legitimate fight, and I think my inability to text stopped me from saying anything I would have really regretted to him.

He's been acting oddly jealous lately, like always curious if I'm hanging out with another guy and sometimes flat-out accusing me of sleeping with other people. I had told him that I was going camping and that we were all going to be drinking, and the first thing he does is ask who is going to be sleeping in my tent and how many boys are going on the trip.

Then he tells me straight: Don't fuck anyone.

Excuse me? You, sir, are not my boyfriend. Even if you were my boyfriend, I can fuck anyone I damn well please. But we are not even dating! You especially have no right to care whom I am fucking or not fucking. I ask him jokingly why he cares if I sleep with anyone, and he comes back at me with a couple of incredibly personally cutting remarks. And just like that, fight.

I sent a one-word reply to piss him off and then just stopped replying all together, because I had to turn my phone off due to the whole middle-of-fucking-nowhere-thing, but he kept sending things. Not a lot of things, mind you, but enough.

Eventually, I turned my phone on for a few minutes to check for emergencies an stuff before we cracked open the vodka. I had to stand on top of a rock to get one bar of signal. Like a boss. Once I had deemed my life emergency-free, I sent one text back to him in reply to all of the shit he'd sent me. I basically told him that he was assuming way more than I was actually doing.

This morning, once we got back into the Denver-ish part of the state, I turned my phone back on and found one final message from him saying that he assumed a lot because he cared a lot and the idea of me sleeping in another guy's tent made him feel sick.

Well, at least he cares... I don't know what to do with this sudden onset of possessive behavior. I don't know whether to take a step back, because jealousness like this is generally a sign of more bad things to come, or if I should take it as a sign of how much he actually cares about me. I know I have to proceed with caution.

Also, for the record, I did not have any sex on this camping trip.

All I know is that I've been talking to him all afternoon and I have made him feel very sorry for saying all that shit to me. I haven't offered any words of forgiveness to him because I don't know how to take this whole fiasco. I'm going to go see him tonight, so if he has anything important to say, hopefully he can get it off of his chest then...

I just don't think he realizes what is at the heart of this situation: commitment. He wants me to be faithful, but I'm not going to be faithful to someone who I don't even technically have. If he wants a commitment from me, all he has to do is ask...

Until then, he has no right to be angry if I decide to fuck anyone else.

Grr.


Julia